To celebrate or not celebrate....that is the question

On Tuesday our family celebrated Sophie's Gotcha Day at P.F. Chang's.  Their food is yummy even if it's not really like what we had in China.  The morning of "Gotcha Day", I began to ponder if we should even make a big deal out of this.  Being the mother of an adopted child, you are faced with different issues than with biological children. You have different worries.  That morning my worries went something like this,  "is this just one more thing that will make Sophie feel different from everyone else.  Is this just one more thing to single her out that she is adopted?  We don't have a day like this for Madison or anyone else in the family.  Maybe we shouldn't make a big deal out of it."   Then as I began to ponder this question I realized that this day is not just about Sophie.  This day is so much more than that.  This day represented a time in our lives that God showed us how big he is.  God was more real to me in China than any other time in my life.  Gotcha Day is a reminder that God is faithful even when it is in his time and not ours. Gotcha Day is a reminder of what happens when you let go of what you want and allow God to work his will for your life.   Gotcha Day is a reminder that families are God's design, not ours, and that he does make beauty from ashes just like he promises in Isaiah 61.  Our family came home from China changed by the grace of God.   None of us are the same and that deserved to be remembered and celebrated.  So as the years progress we will celebrate Gotcha Day and I will use this as a time to teach my daughter not that it's just about her but use it to teach her how big, how wonderful, and how faithful God is.

Heaven Is The Face....Happy 2nd Gotcha Day Sophie

 Heaven is the face of a little girl
With dark brown eyes 
That disappear when she smiles.

Heaven is the place

Where she calls my name says, "daddy please come play with me for awhile."  

God, I know, it's all of this and so much more

But God, you know that this is what I'm aching for God, You know I just can't see beyond the door

So right now

Heaven is the sound of her breathing deep

Lying on my chest, falling fast asleep while I sing

And Heaven is the weight of her in my arms

Being there to keep her safe from harm while she dreams

And God, I know it's all of this and so much more

But God, you know that this is what I'm longing for

And God, you know I just can't see beyond the door

But in my minds eye I can see a place
where Your glory fills every empty space
All the cancer is gone
Every mouth is filled
And there's no one left in the orphans' bed

Every lonely heart finds the one true love

And there's no more goodbye

And no more "not enough"

And there's no more enemy (no more)

Heaven is a sweet, maple syrup kiss

And a thousand other little things I miss with her gone

Heaven is the place where she takes my hand And leads me to you 

And we both run into Your arms.

Oh God, I know, it's so much more than I can dream
It's far beyond anything I can conceive
So God, You know I'll trust in You until I see
Heaven in the face of my little girl.

Heaven Is The Face
Steven Curtis Chapman
Heaven Is The Face video

Happy 2nd Gotcha Day Baby Girl! 

The blue zheesh

This is the Blue Zheesh. It is what some children refer to as a "lovey".  When Sophie came to us in China, she would comfort herself by slipping her index finger into her sleeve and rubbing it against her lips.  This was her method of soothing until summer came and I stopped putting onesies under her clothes.  I guess she loved how they felt because she would go and get them, hand them too me and start pulling at her clothes.  After a few days of me telling her it was too hot and I guess the fact that she no longer had long sleeves to use,  she began using a onesie for her comforting.   It always has to be this particular, long sleeved, trimmed in green thread onesie.  There are two others, one trimmed in yellow, the other in orange.  I got them as a set at one of my showers.  But they will not do.  It must be this particular one.   I get the "blue" because at the time she named it, she was calling all things green... blue. She was just learning her colors.   The zheesh part, we have no idea.  I would say, "lovey?" she would say "zheesh".  It could be something Chinese but we have no way of knowing.

It goes everywhere with us.  It is immediately asked for the minute the car is put into reverse.  It was lost at Seneca Park once and I drove all the way back to find it.  We have turned the car around several times and gone back home because the zheesh was forgotten and the tears were more than Daddy could take.  

Lately, Sophie has been tucking the beloved onesie into her pants. This way she can have her hands free to play yet always have it within reach if a sudden urge to comfort comes over her.

Sophie the teacher

I love to see Sophie playing with her dolls.  I love the way she kisses them, rocks them and "mother's" them.   The other day I was cooking dinner.  I hadn't heard from her for awhile and thought I better just peek in on her.  I loved what I found her doing.

She had all her babies lined up in a row, had her Baby Bible next to her and was teaching them Sunday School.  She would take each baby in her lap, sing to them a little song using their name then have them "pat pat" the Bible which every mom who has had their children in the nursery at Southeast Christian Church knows why that is, Palma Smiley!  

It was precious!

The Best Laid Plans of a mom......

I had a plan.  It was a good plan....or so I thought.  Our family went to church on Saturday night.  I got up on Sunday, scanned the Target and Hobby Lobby ads, filled my cup of coffee and got busy.  The plan was to clean the house, get all the laundry done and put away, then on Monday at 9:00 a.m. when I dropped Sophie off at Mother's Day Out, I would come back home with nothing to do but play around in my scrapbook room.  It was going to be my day.   My plan was working better than expected.  Camden and Madison got in on the cleaning and helped me all morning and things were going very quickly.  But as we all cleaned and I began getting ready to go to the Lyle Lovette concert that evening with my husband my plan began to fall apart as my little girl who had began coughing a few days earlier now was feverish and getting worse.  By the time we got home from the concert her fever was a 102 and I knew what that meant, my plans had changed.   I am now sitting here waiting for the clock to strike 9:00 a.m., not to hear Ms. Steaphanie tell Sophie Happy Valentines Day but instead to hear that familiar phrase, "Pediatric Associates, how may I help you?"

You've Got Mail

There is something exciting about going to the mailbox and their being a surprise package.  Sophie was thrilled when I brought in the mail and told her she had something.  It was a package from her Aunt D.  She ran and got her beloved "art work" scissors and tried to cut open the package.  I ended up helping her and she was thrilled  to open her first Valentine gift of the season.  Thanks D!  It made her day.  

Art Work Time

 

"It's art work time".  This is Sophie's new phrase.  I'm not sure if she picked it up from Mother's Day out or a cartoon but it is her "thing".  There are art supplies all over my house.  She has taken all my Scotch tape, envelopes and sticky notes.  I have none left.   Whenever you ask her what she is doing, she says, "art work time."  She does art work time in her room, at the kitchen table, the living room floor and in the car.   Her signature piece right now is to take envelopes, cut paper and write letters to put in them.  Some times she even brings them to me to write names on them for her.  She will tape the envelope shut, decorate the outside and bring it to you as a gift.  She is so proud of these envelopes and tells me, "no throw away."

Sunday Snapshot-Chinese New Year

It's the Year of the Rabbit.  Tonight our local FCC (Families with Children from China) chapter had their annual Chinese New Year Celebration.  This is our first year to participate.  Sophie and I went with our playgroup friends.  We had a wonderful time.

I made this outfit to donate for the Silent Auction.  All the money goes to help orphans in China.  I will be making Sophie a set just like it.  It turned out so cute.

Sophie's Chinese Province.

Her Rabbit cookie looks scrumptious!

Sophie and little Lydia.

Sophie would not participate in the dragon dance.  He scared her.

Proudly wearing her Chinese silks.

The dancing was Sophie's favorite part.  She stood up and strutted her stuff along with the dancers.

This is all I get?

Sophie wanted me to color with her.  I gladly accepted.  I printed off some coloring pages from Nick Jr. and she went to get the colored pencils (her preference).  I noticed as we sat down to color that she put the box of 36 pencils in front of her and all I got was the measly box of 12 colors and I think there was even one missing.  When I asked to borrow one of her pencils so I could have a darker shade of green she said, "no, these are mine".  There was no way I could color my beautiful firefly picture with such limited color choices.  After some begging, pleading, and threatening not to color any more, she finally let me borrow a pencil.  I think I will show her and pick myself up the 64 box of Crayolas with the built in sharpener.  That will show her.